We need to change how we see polygamy in Islam, as it’s holding us back as a community. Muslims will have problems, as long as they view polygamy as an anomaly. They need to see it for what it is. Particularly, it is a good way of life that Allah allows for us. The same as we view a monogamous marriage as the norm, we should see a polygamous one as the norm, as well.
There are so many fallacies about it. For instance, when it comes to a man taking on a 2nd, 3rd or 4th wife, some say that he should marry a woman of a certain status. Meaning, he should marry a divorced or widowed or barren woman or one who is past a certain age. Many Muslims have portrayed them as being undesirable to wed first.
The truth is that it is okay for men to marry those women first. The most compelling evidenced is in the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). He married Khadijah who was fifteen years older than him. She had been married before him, as well. They lived a monogamous marriage. A Muslim many may marry any Muslim woman who is single. Furthermore, he may marry her in any order.